Varekai.

So last week I scored some free tickets to Cirque de Soleil. This one was called "Varekai", and from what little I could gather from the "story", Icarus falls out of the sky and lands in some pretty fucked up forest, complete with craz-ass acrobats, little juggling asian kids, a sexy caterpillar, and a shit-load of spandex. It was cool. I liked "Alegria" better, but you know...

Anyway, everyone was amazing. The dude that does the routine on the walking sticks? DOPE. Sign that guy up for a role in a new kick-ass kung fu flick. He could be the unassuming, crippled master that all of a sudden busts out the crazy walking stick moves and then you're all like "oh shit!" You laugh now but just wait... It'll happen.

But I digress. So the caterpillar eventually metamorphesisizes into a contortionist! Now, I know... No big deal. But this particular caterpillar-turned-contortionist was pretty stacked.

I don't know about you, but I usually associate contortionists with being like 4 feet tall, weighing 85 pounds and looking like a rail. Not this one! Pretty buff. And like I said before. Pretty stacked. It added a whole new dimension to body-bending-gazing. Fascinating...

Fascinating enough thatI had look some shit up on the inter-web. I learned that the dude that does the routine with the walking sticks... He's not really crippled. Not that there was every really a doubt... And after stumbling across some pretty weird contortionist websites, I found out that our little caterpillar is a Russian Olympic gymnast. Irina is her name.

Irina the stacked contortionist.